MISSION

I am supposed to like Radiohead. I know this because everyone tells me so, including my computer. The computer itself doesn't tell me; actually my Dell laptop is rather passive (it's had two total meltdowns, which I think were stress related). Rather the Radiohead recommendations come from mysterious agents through the Internet.

Remember CDnow.com? They were the authoritative place to buy CD's online before the days of itunes. I think CD Now was absorbed by Amazon. Anyway, I have always been a big fan of Beck, and when I would look through the Beck albums for sale on CDnow.com, even though I already owned all of them (as well as the imported singles), I would see a little tab off to one side that said something like, "if you like BECK, then we recommend these artists."

Cake was one of the bands that CD Now believed that Beck fans would dig, as well as Bjork. I can see comparing Beck to Cake; keep in mind that this was ten or eleven years ago. Odelay and Midnite Vultures could be sonic cousins to Comfort Eagle or Fashion Nugget, I suppose. Bjork is a bit of strech though. I assumed that the assumption was, "if you like music that is both weird and difficult to categorize, then you'll like this chick named Bjork too - after all, both their names kinda sound the same!"

Always included on the list was Radiohead.

Fast Forward ten years - the awesome amusement device known as Pandora also insists that I must like Radiohead if I like Beck. I give "Lonesome Tears" a thumbs-up and the next thing I know I'm listening to "Spinning Plates".

I know next to nothing about Radiohead.

In a deleted scene from Pulp Fiction, Uma Thurman asks John Travolta who he likes more: The Beatles or Elvis. Uma claims that one person can like both the Fabs and the King but that you'll always like one more than the other. The obvious choice for Travolta's character is Elvis, and it's also the obvious answer you're supposed to give to someone when they ask you this in real life. For whatever reason, it's just not cool to admit that you like things like catchy melodies and tight harmonies and songs about hippie love. I, for one, will admit to being a Beatles fan. But the question that usually gets asked is, 'do you like the Beatles more than the Stones'. I like to disappoint people by saying that I like The Who the best.

When it comes to 90's music, I think I was just too busy with other bands that I liked to bother with Radiohead. I loved Beck, and rocked out to Soundgarden, Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins, Elastica and Blur. Anyway, Soundgarden's last two albums are both over an hour long, and Smashing Pumpkins gave us the 90's only notable double album, so that right there is a lot of music to sift through. My other excuse is that Radiohead was already disappearing from the mainstream radar by the time I started getting serious about music. The guys in Radiohead claimed that they detested their hit song Creep, and besides Kharma Police, they got no radio play (which is very ironic considering that the band has 'radio' in their name).

By now, I've listened to Superunknown and Badmotorfinger and Bleach and Nevermind and In Utero and Gish and Mellon Collie and Siamese Dream and Blur and Elasitca's self-titled albums so many times that I'm ready to find something new. Other than the few new bands my friend Eric turned me on to (LCD Soundsystem, MIA, Band of Horses, Vampire Weekend) I spent most of the 2000-2009 decade not actively searching out new sonic experiences. I was never into Pearl Jam, but I bought a used copy of Ten for two dollars only to discover that I still was not really into Pearl Jam. I figured that this would be a good time to do what my computer and all the kids at art school told me to do ten years ago: listen to some Radiohead.

I will listen to each Radiohead album in the order that they were released, one album per week. That is my mission.

Here's what I know about Radiohead as of right now:

1. They are British.
2. Their singer is named Thom Yorke, and he's a difficult man to interview, is a big supporter of environmentalist causes, and probably the type of guy who would describe himself as a 'cat person'.
3. Their lead guitarist is Johnny Greenwood, and he did the music for There Will Be Blood.
4. The original name of the group was "On A Friday", which the band's label forced them to change because the label felt it was too uncommercial, which is ironic for obvious reasons.
5. I know how to play Creep on guitar, and know most of the lyrics.
6. Creep is now treated like an unwanted bastard son by the band.
7. The band had another successful song called Kharma Police. I know most of the lyrics to this song, but do not know the chords to it.
8. The video for Kharma Police is awesome, yet Radiohead seems like the type of band who thinks that all music videos debase their Art.
9. I did hear their song Just a few times, and saw the video for it, and think that both the song and the video rock.
10. They have songs called Fake Plastic Trees and Paranoid Android. To the best of my knowledge, I have never heard these songs.
11. They have a song called Spinning Plates, which I have heard twice, and to be honest I don't think it qualifies as a song.
12. They have a song on the Romeo and Juliet soundtrack called Talk Show Host. I usually skip this song when I play the CD.
13. The band does not like to tour, or promote themselves, or be rock stars in general.
14. I know that everyone who claims they are a big music buff seems to like them, and that these people get upset when I tell them that I'm not very familiar with The Head.

That is literally everything that I know about Radiohead. I haven't left anything out.

I hope that you enjoy watching me stumble along on this musical adventure. I hope that you enjoy seeing me reach the same conclusions that others have published fifteen years ago. This should be fun.

And no, I don't plan on doing the same thing for Bjork.